So this happened. Sometimes forgiveness happens and anyone who read previous entries (now locked) will know what this means and why my joy is the result.
But it other areas it is not. Still having issues with my family. Shortly after the above even happened I found out that one of my cousins started a group for the “family” but I am not allowed to join. This is payback or a continuation of drama that happened six years now, when I wrote a note on Facebook about a cousin who very rudely and ungraciously made valued private time with my grandmother and parents all about her. My parents live in Nova Scotia and I only got to visit them once a year…at Christmas. This cousin who lives 5 minutes up the way stormed our Christmas meal…and when told we had just said down rudely said, we’ll just wait in the living room for yo to finish an pushed her way past my mother and me with her husband in kids in tow and did just that. This despite the fact that she lives 5 minutes away, had 364 other days a year to visit our grandmother but never did. She just wanted to be “seen” on an important day so she could forget about her on the rest of the days. I was outraged and felt totally disrespected. When I vented on Facebook about it a year later because a new Christmas was coming up, it became this whole thing. I didn’t even name her or tell the gender…she outed herself and since then has made it her mission to turn as many of my family members as she can against me. The cousin who started the Facebook Group is one of her recruits.
I was told this would happen because I’m “from away” and don’t understand their ways. It’s amazing how much many of them can hurt my mother, insult her, start rumours and untruths about her, despite the fact that she sacrificed everything to give up her life and take care of my grandmother (her mother) when none of them wanted to do it and weren’t helping out an obviously ailing woman, but you hold up a mirror to their behavior and they get all bent out of shape to the extent that you could call them batshit crazy.
The best thing about visiting my parents is that I got to spend 24/7 with my grandmother as her life was ending. Soon after my parents took over her care it became clear that she was developing dementia. But it was my total pleasure and honour to spend such quality time with her in her last years. Even if I had to answer something 100 times or hold her hand or sit with her while she napped, it was my pleasure and honour. I loved her and until the last time I saw her, she knew who I was and she knew that I loved her. And she knew that my mother helped her to continue living in her own home with dignity.
And this cousin who is doing this is obviously a bully. But as with most bullies, she is also a coward. When this first happened she could not go to my mother and tell her (I’m in my 40s btw and they think telling my mother somehow shames me…they so don’t know my mother and I), she got my aunt to do it. Then when my grandmother died, and she wanted one of my grandmother’s tea cups she asked another aunt to ask her. She couldn’t, again face my mother, I gather because although she continues with her campaign she knows what she has done is wrong and she cannot face my mother. So my mother told her that the teacup and saucer that she requested was put aside for her to come and pick it up…she sent her father to fetch it for her. Little bitch.
So when this Facebook thing happened I just blocked the perps. Including a cousin who wrote me accusing my mom of being a thief. When she attacked me on Facebook twice a couple of years later I brought this up to her and she called me a fool saying she insulted my mother to get to me. The mind of a person with an unfortunately very low IQ. And she’s in the armed forces…I pity Canada.
Moving on now…just had to vent a little.
I have been developing a new relationship with my uncle on my father’s side. His youngest brother. A bit of a mixed up boy but still my uncle and at least one of his relatives that I can talk to.
Had to put a mean girl in her place and she did not like it. I don’t feel guilty about it. Ever meeting one of those girls that exude postiveness, new agey, change your life crap but when you catch them in their stuff they do not like it one bit? Their “niceness” goes out the door. This happened with someone that I had used as a professional but not like a doctor or anything and she allowed, I feel, the lines to be grayed as far as socializing. She had been leading me on for months promising that we would get together for a meal, which got downgraded to coffee, etc. So I knew two other girls that I had taken a class with and this professional. I had had dinner with two of them. I tried for weeks to organize a dinner with these girls. One said yes and reorganized her schedule a couple of times to accommodate the other two that were coming up with excuses. Finally the professional said to go ahead without her because she’ll be busy for the foreseeable future and the other one said she had like 5 jobs now and wouldn’t be available but then she wrote me an email telling me how to make friends (I had put the invitation in the manner of wanting to enlarge my social circle). The one who actually did say yes then cancelled saying she would wait until the others were available. I told her that wasn’t going to happen because it appears that it was me they didn’t want to have dinner with.
After this I got kind of pissed and unfollowed the “professional” and the other one. Then a couple of weeks ago some tweets made it in my feed where they were organizing a dinner with each other on Twitter! Something the “professional” had chastized me for saying there were a lot of weirdos out there. So I posted my own Tweet saying how disappointed I was in this situation and at then end put in this professional’s name. LOL She didn’t like that. First thing she did was block me on Twitter. Then the next morning she wrote me telling me how surprised she was because she had been nothing but kind and helpful to me and that not everything has to do with me and that people have the best of intentions and how surprised and disappointed she was with me. Yada yada yada. Perfect girl speak for who did I think I was calling her out on her shit.
So I wrote her back telling her that I had worked long and hard trying to organize this dinner and was lead on for a few weeks until she finally said a definitive NO and then it fell apart and I didn’t appreciate it. Then she goes into “professional mode” as her last line of defence and says that she doesn’t as a rule socialize with clients! And I said well isn’t that interesting because up until that time you had been promising me that we would go out together. And I’m disappointed and feeling rejected because I was trying to get to know a few people better who I admired. Then she says to me “No Hard Feelings”? Mean girl.
So when it became obvious that she wanted the last word I just deleted the email and blocked her on Twitter. So now I have to find other ways to make friends. I have a stellar Internet social network…not so much on the personal side. I have started trying to maybe socialize with them personally. I met up with a few of them at Wizard Con and a couple of them go to the zoo a lot and I’m hoping we can go to the zoo together.
I’ve also started filling out my eHarmony profile and I hope that I can get a good profile going so that I can start socializing with the men folk a bit. I feel like I am open and ready for life. Without tempting fate I hope it is safe to say that I’m at a good place in my life and I want someone to share it with.
On another sad note. I had to give up a friend due to drug usage, hers not mine. She started doing cocaine and I told her daughter because I couldn’t deal with the what ifs of something happening to her and her daughter not knowing. That backfired of course because she’s an addict. We kind of mutually ended things after that. I feel that she was also paying for her cocaine with sex. She doesn’t make enough money to buy cocaine herself. The guy she was sometimes seeing was giving her cocaine in exchange for sex and in exchange for her having sex with other people. This is her being a “big ass woman” and “taking care of herself” as she puts it. It breaks my heart but I cannot be part of an addict’s life who is in denial. I’ve got my own problems.
I’m very happy because my mom and stepdad are coming up in a couple of weeks and he will be here for Father’s Day so I can treat him and my mom out to an evening. Dinner and a movie!!! Of course my mom will want to see the bill and want to leave the tip. I’m 48 but still her baby you know? But that’s ok. I like being her baby and having her as my mom! My stepdad is a great guy. He definitely stepped up where my own father did not. They’ve lived in Nova Scotia for about 7 years now, it will be good to give them some special treatment. Well ciao for now!